Children need their parents

Many know that I am a staff writer for the website GotQuestions.org, and earlier this week I received a question that I wanted to share as well as the answer that I provided.  Divorce is something that hurts us all, affects us all, and in one way or another tears at the very fabric of the family unit in more ways than just legally.  Having been through a divorce myself it saddens me to see so many hurt in this way and I even wrote about this earlier this year in THIS post. 

Question:

My husband is living with the woman he had an affair with. Should I give him access to our children? He wants them to live with him part time and he wants to divorce me. Should I fight in court to keep the kids from going to this type of setting? Proverbs says the home of the adulteress leads to death. Should I keep them from going to his house or spending time with their father and adulteress together?

Answer:

Thank you for writing to us. Prayerfully, you will receive this answer in the way that it was meant; which is in love for Christ that we both have and not as a personal attack. I have been divorced for 11 months now and I know exactly what you are feeling in this.

Biblically speaking, you both are responsible for raising your children and providing a stable atmosphere for them to grow up and be loved in. This is what the Psalmist tells us in Psalm 127:3, “Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him.” In regards to visitation, this is going to be determined by a court and unless there is a provable, documented, criminal reason (drugs, abuse, etc.) why the children cannot see him (and in turn this lady) he is going to at least get visitation, whether you have joint-custody or not. Your attorney will best be able to walk you through this process and may recommend saving money by not refusing visitation because you are angry. You must be level-headed in this process. Anger only ties you down and keeps you from healing, which in turn hurts your children.

Having been through a divorce I can tell you that the process is painful, but through Christ you WILL be and ARE able to heal. My personal recommendation to you is to NOT allow your children to be the center of your argument, nor to be pawns in the blaming of one another, but that they would know that mom and dad love them both and will always be their parents. I would also recommend some grief and personal counseling (face to face is much better than online mainly for accountability purposes) to help manage/work-through these feelings of anger and allow you to heal to be the best mommy you can for them.

God bless you and may God bless your children because they need to have peace to grow up loved and stable young adults. ~ Rev TJ Conwell

The 2012 GOP Convention

I’ve waited to write anything about the 2012 Republican National Convention until it concluded because I really wanted to just spend time taking it all in.  And so, now that the RNC is over and done with and the road to the White House is under way … my only thought is … “Wow”.  For three nights I watched the GOP showcase it’s best but truly, the 3rd night was the best of all.

For three nights I also sparred and chatted with friends (old and new) on Twitter and Facebook and realized that so many are praying for our country, and how we truly need Jesus in this land.  There was great humor (thanks to Clint Eastwood), outstanding testimonies, very motivational speeches (my personal favorites were:  The Bush #41 and #43 video,  Ann Romney, Congressman Artur Davis, Governor Nikki HaleyGovernor Susana MartinezSecretary Condoleezza Rice, and Vice Presidential Candidate Paul Ryan, along with of course Presidential Candidate Mitt Romney) … but there was one testimony in particular that I want to talk about.

I want to talk about the Oparowski family.  This family … this sweet, loving, genuine, elderly couple absolutely reduced me to tears in my home as they recalled the Mitt Romney they knew in the 70’s.  My heart bled for them while they talked, but what I realized was without the cameras, the press, and the lights was one simple FACT:  Mitt Romney is a genuine man who loves people as Christ loved His church.  Below is their testimony and I have only one thing to say in response to this:  Lord, please let me show Jesus like this to others around me. 

So now the campaign is in full swing, and we watch the Liberal attacks which will surely come, but prayerfully this path that Mr. Romney and Mr. Ryan are on will end at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington, DC, on November 6th, 2012.  May God bless you, and truly may He bless the United States of America.